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I Can't Stand the Horror Trope of Slashers that Can 'Teleport'

  Credit to  Teleportation Vector Images | Depositphotos There is one horror trope that always bothers me when it comes to several horror movies.  How the hell can a slasher be in two places at once? What I mean by that is…why do horror directors sometimes ignore how a human can move? I’ve seen several horror movies that were really great, but were ruined by a killer who was able to teleport.  That doesn’t make any sense.  Unless time travel is involved, then go for it, but a human killer can’t teleport! Where does this sudden supernatural ability come from? It’s just so…stupid. So, like, does the mask or the outfit give the killer powers or what? This is a random side rant, but I felt the need to talk about this. I recently remembered a horror movie where the killer was able to be at two places at once, while he was going after two people.  Like he somehow was able to travel across the entire city in seconds to catch up to the other victim. How??? Not even science can explain this!!!

Creepshow 2 Did Not Deserve so Much Hate from Critics

 

Credit to Music Box Theatre

Warning: Will contain major spoilers from Creepshow 2

I couldn’t understand how the sequel to the iconic Creepshow film received so much criticism. This anthology film had great stories that were well written, and despite the silliness of the insane ideas, it was terrifying!

I adore the sequel to Creepshow, and I dare say that I prefer this one over the first film!

The stories in the original focused on more of a psychological aspect, and the main focus of the horror in the sequel was to show the consequences of one's actions. 

Let me tell you, the consequences are brutal. Not a single person is given mercy in any of the three short stories. 

I’m not even sure which fate is worse…

Old Chief Wood ‘ nhead focuses on a killer statue that exacts revenge against the people who murdered his owners.

Credit to Screenrant

A lovely older couple is living in their small town that is slowly fading away, where they have a general store of their own. They own an Indian statue that the couple appears to be very fond of, named Old Chief Wood ‘nhead. 

The couple is then robbed at gunpoint, and is murdered in their store by a group of dudes. The statue suddenly comes to life, wanting revenge for the people he lost. 

He goes after each person from the group, killing them one by one. Even though the thought of a killer statue is kind of silly, I have to give credit to the writers for sticking to practical effects!

The statue looked so cool coming to life, one of my favorite scenes is when you see the outline of his shadow after one of his kills. Such a neat idea!

The short film ends with the statue being found by someone who lives in the town, noticing that the statue was holding the scalp from one of his victims. The man acknowledges that something bad happened, and decides to leave. 

Smart dude. I would have immediately done the same.

The Raft shows some of the most brutal kills I have seen in horror.


Credit to 411Mania

The Raft follows the story of four college kids who decide to go for a swim in an empty lake. The four kids decide to swim all the way to the raft in the middle of the lake, having a good time. 

Little do the kids know that there is something lurking in the water. 

Once they get on top of the raft, the kids notice something black swimming towards them. The first victim to bite the dust gets curious, and decides to attempt to touch the black thing swimming underneath the raft. 

The black slime wraps itself around her, ripping off her skin in the process. She is pulled into the water, and in the most iconic shot of the sequel, she reaches for her friends, covered from head to toe in the black goo before being pulled under. 

Then the muscular guy is killed next, being pulled through the raft. I cringed when one of his legs was bent in a horrible way, as he slowly sunk to his death. 

The third victim was grabbed by the face, and she screamed in agony as she could feel her skin being ripped off. She is pulled into the lake, succumbing to her death. 

The last to die is a guy, who actually makes it all the way to shore. He taunts the creature at the edge of the shore, only for the black slime to rise up and completely engulf the dude whole. 

I will never forget my mother as she died of laughter when I freaked out over this guy’s death. I honestly thought he had made it, that twist death was executed so well!

I also loved how original the kills were. You know how in a slasher that they kill certain crew members off first? In this one, it was reversed. 

The girl that you thought would be the final girl dies first. 

The jock dies second. 

The pretty girl gets killed next.

Then the clown is the last to die. 

Neat!

Then that ending of the film really sucked, as the camera slowly got closer to a hidden sign that said, “No Swimming.”

Brilliant!

What’s funny is that The Blob remake was released in 1988…the sequel of Creepshow was released in 1987…what a coincidence, huh?

The Hitchhiker is one of the best and most terrifying horror shorts that sent chills down my spine. 

Credit to MovieWeb


The Hitchhiker is the only Creepshow story to scare the crap out of me.

The story follows a rich lady who decides to drive back home in the dark. During the drive, she ends up running over a hitchhiker.

What does she do?

Why, she does what any good Samaritan would do.

She leaves the crime scene. 

This always gets me so mad. No one ever takes responsibility after accidentally killing someone during a hit and run in horror. 

Bastards. 

Luckily, the rich lady gets the ultimate karma. 

While she is driving home totally traumatized, you see the hitchhiker in the background, walking in the dark. This part got to me so bad. 

Background shots have always bothered me, and that was nightmare fuel. 

The hitchhiker proceeds to haunt the woman, coming after her multiple times during her car ride back home. During each appearance, he become more decompoosed, taunting her with the same line over and over:

“Thanks for the ride, lady!”

It’s simple, yet so scary! The implications are horrible, knowing what happened to him…and he made sure that the woman would remember that. 

The story ends with her arriving home, and then she is caught by the hitchhiker, his face completely missing at this point. It ends with her husband finding the woman, her dead body in the car. 

It appears that the hitchhiker’s sign was positioned right in front of her dead body. 

What makes this short story so compelling is that you never actually know what really happened. This story could be interpreted in 2 ways:

Was it all in her head, and did the guilt eat away at her?

Or was the hitchhiker actually coming after her?

Who knows?

And that is why this will always remain my favorite Creepshow story.

To all horror fans out there, go watch Creepshow 2! Don’t listen to the critics! I guarantee you will love every single horror story in the sequel!



Thank you for reading!

Emy Quinn



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